The Host Romp Continues

"Jeez, Tyson says he's better at Halo, and then just uses host shotgun." ---- "Dave, we're all on the same xbox, there's no host." ----- "Oh, Tyson is still hosting up that n00b shotgun." ----- "Dave, you just killed me." ---- "God Tyson, stop using host for ONE second!" ----- "THERE'S NO HOST! We're playing Dead or Alive!" -The Host Romp Continues


While waiting in line at a KFC where outside, protesters are picketing against the establishment and how it treats it's animals, two protesters are seen inside, in the line: "Uhh, hey, aren't you protesting KFC?" ----- "Yeah, well, we're only getting the fries, okay?" -A friend of mine and a protester


"I think cliffhanger endings are..." -Get it?


"Well baby, when I first saw you, we were at the hippy rock show. You called me an ignorant male oppressor, and spat in my face because I like meat. But the first time I got a whiff of that patchouli you were wearing, oh, I knew it was love. I think we're gonna make it." -Reese Roper



Once, Rebecca got me a new shirt. Logically, I figured the next step after receiving it was tearing my other shirt to pieces, putting it in a bag, and leaving it behind the Dairy Queen counter in the mall when the girl wasn't looking. Then Rebecca told me that I couldn't go join Women's Fitness. What a day. -Me at the mall



"Now the world doesn't work cause we've broken it,
And we need dope or Prozac just to cope with it,
Now the beast speaks his peace to the congress,
Plans to propagate, proposition 666.
Hitler's still alive in the knives of abortionists,
And the news twists the truth like contortionists,
And they wonder what happened to humanity?
They say "peace" but we're headed for THE DAIRY QUEEN" -The best parody ever written



Trixie
Tricky
Turkey
Turker
Turk
Foobar -The degeneration of my dog's name by me

(Regarding above: After a spellcheck, the only name on the list of dog names revealed to be a spelling error was Turker. Think about it.)



"So, how long have you two been dating?"----
*Checks watch*
"Nearly 11 months." -I heart my watch



"Looks like you're gonna fail math Dave. You'll be in a lot of trouble when your parents find out."----- "Not if I blow math up!" *pulls out dynamite plunger*------ "Dave, what could you have possibly strapped dynamite to, that would blow up math?" ----- "Stephen Hawking."
-It's about time someone blew him up



"Homer, there's someone here who I think can help you."
"Is it Batman?"
"No, it's a scientist."
"Batman's a scientist."
"It's not Batman!" -Homer and Marge



"Let's go outside, Foobar."



-Dave